Friday, 25 March 2016

Dorothy Must Die by Danielle Paige

Dorothy Must Die (Dorothy Must Die, #1)Dorothy Must Die by Danielle Paige

My rating: 1 of 5 stars

Buddy read with Emma.

'It's not magic that makes you who you are.'

Recently, I've come across a lot of fairy-tale retold in young-adult books. When I was young, I never fancied fairy-tales. I was not the amongst the girls who wanted to be Cinderalla or Snow White. I didn't wish to be a princess because I already was a little princess in my family. Instead I wanted to be a cool spy or a brave police officer. It did not change even when I grew older. I don't particularly dislike fairy-tales, but I never was very fond of them. It never changed, but I seemed to enjoy retells more than the original story itself. Cinder, the first book of the Lunar Chronicles is my favourite. I expected Dorothy Must Die to get the same when I heard that it was a young-adult retell. If not for a buddy read, I'd probably have skimmed past the rest because this book is a disgrace to the original.

Amy is a teenager from Kansas, who is bullied at school and unmotivated mother, living is a dump. Amy, like Dorothy from the well-known Wizard of Oz, stumbles into a whole knew adventure. Guess what? Our protagonist from the Wizard of Oz is characterised as the antagonist. She is ruining the world, and Amy must kill her. Is there anyone else other than me who thinks that this book has the most asinine plot?

'Simple. You're just going to kill her.' She looked right at me and said, 'Dorothy must die.'

Let's start with the plot itself. I recently finished Wizard of Oz, and I fail to see any sort interesting connection between that. There is Amy from Kansas - same as Dorothy, and Dorothy herself - characterised quite the contrary. You can find a handful of things from there which were picked up from the classic and dropped into a prosaic young-adult story. No, when I heard from a fan, I thought it would be at least a little plausible. Wizard of Oz cannot be considered a plausible plot, but for the sake of fantasy, yes. This should have at least the minimum amount of plausibility in the classic. Be more realistic.
'I'm not Nox.'
'Nox is just the name Mombi gave me. I don't remember my real name. I remember my parents. Their faces. The way they smelled and sounded. I remember the day that they were taken from me. But my name washed away with them. And there's no one alive who remembers it.'

Did Nox just say he remembered everything but his name? He remembers his parents, their voices, *their smell* but he does not remember his name. Dig deeper and you will find that it had been 'washed away with them'. That is not how you personify. Firstly, it is more plausible if he remembers nothing except one from that list. Or he remembers his name and nothing else. It is highly implausible for him to remember everything but his name. He even remembers the back story behind it! Doofenshmirtz is jealous.

'I want yours to be, Amy.'

Next, why was Dorothy portrayed as the antagonist here again? If you're going to give me the behind every hero is a greater hero trash, then you've got to be kidding me. A hero exists in every person - I do believe in that, but I disagree when you say that one book character can have a person better than him somewhere. The characters, of course, must never be immaculate, but making someone superior to them and suddenly turning them unchivalrous does not earn my admiration. I like it when they are given the same traits, or their entire story is different. Dorothy is a nice person; turning her into the Wicked Witch of the West has earned my chagrin. Moral of the story: Do not turn Dora the Explorer into the Wicked Witch of the West.

'You have to kill Dorothy, Amy.'

Let me continue with the characters. Amy Gumm is one of the most annoying protagonist I had to share a literary journey with. Why you ask? It's because she is just a pretentious and irrational teenager with no amiable qualities whatsoever. She is bullied at school, and ta-daa: her mum abuses drugs. She meets some strangers, has lessons with an eccentric and viola! She is assigned the task to kill Dorothy. You'll die of shock when you heard what made them choose her:
'When I first saw you, Amy Gumm, your hair was the thing that gave me hope for you. For all of us.'
Am I the only one who finds it absurd, or has everyone else accepted this? When I read this one, my reaction was pretty much similar to Amy's. Seriously? Honestly, how often do you find people who think that a person with good hair can save the entire world. Maybe you should knock in some sense into you characters. I do agree there are many airheaded and silly characters I've liked and accepted, but don't mix absurdity if you're trying to be serious.

My next problem is lack of detailed description. The writing style did not appease me, but what's worse: no detailed description. I hate to break it to you, but putting a full stop after every two words and breaking the sentences is not very interesting. Also, a couple of things were best if they were elucidated better so that they give a more clear picture, and make better sense.
'What is wrong with that woman?' I asked Nox as if escorted me to dinner on the night of my first lesson with Glamora. He took the books she'd given me and they dematerialized into thin air — I presumed back to my room where I could study them later.
He looked at me wryly. 'You got yourself beat up and you're learning how to do magic — but you're mad about reading a couple of books?'

So according to this, Nox just took the books from Amy and the books dematerialized into the air. Isn't there a missing link here? Shouldn't there be some sort of magic power that he used or something? If there is nothing, then everything he takes will dematerialize and go to some random place. And.... That wouldn't be very nice, would it? Especially if it's food or a book. I tried to take the literal meaning of that, and the sentence has given a vague and irrational meaning.

How do I start with the asinine dialogues?
'Salvation Amy's jealous. She wishes this were her baby.'
Okay, how exactly did someone else decide what you're thinking? And that Amy is jealous about someone else being pregnant: I don't think so. Let's try to ignore the fact that they are still in school. Tell me this is just a dream. I certainly cannot bear with any more of these jejune dialogues.
'Never underestimate a girl who Kansas.'
Quick question: Are people from Kansas patronised? I've heard - 'Never underestimate a skinny girl,' 'Never underestimate the power of a common person,' but 'Never underestimate a girl from Kansas'? Is being from Kansas a good thing or a bad thing? Well, I wouldn't go to California, speak with my posh accent, spell words with a 'u' in it, top the class and say, 'Never underestimate a girl from London.'
How about some random extracts I found absurd?
'Not so talented after all, are you? Just another outlander who thinks she's special.'
'What's underneath is everything, Amy. But that doesn't mean you can't enhance it. Beauty has its own kind of magic. And the appearance of something can have power, too.'

Say something positive about the book? Well, I have nothing positive to say about this! I'd rather delete my playlists and download all Taylor Swift songs, and listen to it for 16 whole hours.

Please do not even mention the second book. If it is going to be the same, I'd rather stay at school and listen to my boring principal's tedious speeches for two whole hours.

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Thursday, 3 March 2016

Throne of Glass by Sarah J Maas

Throne of Glass (Throne of Glass, #1)Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Maas

My rating: 1 of 5 stars

Throne of Glass

“Libraries were full of ideas–perhaps the most dangerous and powerful of all weapons.”

Candidly speaking, I did have high expectations for Throne of Glass. I expected it to be as good as my favourite young-adult books; I was hoping it would be tantamount to Divergent so that I could have yet another series to rave about. And of course, a new series would mean more books! More books would mean more escapism from reality happiness. How could I not? The rating details are so close to each other! However, ratings are not the amiability of the book.

“We all bear scars,... Mine just happen to be more visible than most.”

Celaena Sardothien is an assassin - a rather good one to be precise. She is the most dangerous assassin in the kingdom of Adarlan. She used to work in the salt mines, but was caught for her felonies. Ignoring the latter, I didn't even dare to not think of the correspondence between this book and The Hunger Games; I do not intend to suggest any accusations of plagiarism here. Prince Dorian offers her a choice: to fight and become good champion. If she wins, she gets her liberty; if she losses, she will be killed by the others, which would be ironic since she is allegedly the best assassin in the kingdom. I beg for forgiveness to those Sarah Maas fans whose hearts I might probably break by saying this, but I fail to recognize this as an interesting plot. I mean, isn't she *the best assassin in the kingdom*. Or was that just a prejudiced statement meant to deceive us readers in the beginning?

“My name is Celaena Sardothien. But it makes no difference if my name's Celaena or Lillian or Bitch, because I'd still beat you, no matter what you call me.”

Of course I found the plot very prosaic, so let me move on to my character analysis. Ladies first: Celaena Sardthien (I wish I could rename her!) is *the best assassin in the kingdom of Adarlan*. She was tedious, annoying, vindictive, narcissistic, moronic, and most importantly, one big Mary Sue! I honestly don't find a legitimate reason to be biased between America Singer and Celaena Sardthien. Both are these immaculate characters who must never go wrong. Instead of practicing for the competitions, she wrote a letter to Prince Dorian begging him to let her read. I'm not trying to imply that assassins must not be book-loves; my friends would condemn me if I did so because I'm a huge murderous bookworm with a few attributes of a delinquent. I'm trying to say that she has to be the *best assassin in the kingdom* (I know my sarcastic repetition of this must be galling, but please bear with it), she cannot beg the Prince for a book to read right before the day of the competition. She can read - of course - but if she has to win this thing, and is genuinely the best, she does not spend the night before the competition which could probably be the last night imprisoned, or the last night of her life, reading.

"How about the story of the idiotic prince who won't leave the assassin alone?"

Let me move on to Prince Dorian and the bookish idiot boyfriend of thousands of fangirls, Chaol. Dorian, Dorian, Dorian! Ah, what shall I say about him?! A total idiot whom I barely liked because all he can think of is forming a love triangle! And I still don't know how people are in love with Chaol because he is one irritating character with very little amiability. No, I'm not kidding. Unless my barely conscious self is deceiving me, I believe he is the Captain of the Guard. Well, act like one.

“We all bear scars,... Mine just happen to be more visible than most.”

What do we have left? Right! Writing style! Well, the writing style was tedious, monotonous, prosaic, boring, any other adjective which shares the same meaning as these words, and is the best assassin in the bookworld. I simply cannot stand any of this. Switching from first person to third person was not a very good idea. The characterization was poor to. I could gather little about Celaena (would someone like change this name!), a word about Dorian, a phrase about Chaol, a title about the king. Maybe Certainly, this aspect of the book needs working on.

"How had she gone from the most feared prisoner in Endovier to this sappy mess?"

I have better work to do other than elucidating a review on a book which has nothing in it. I'm not the best at ranting either - albeit I'm always doing so. For crying out loud, Throne of Glass is a book; not a floss I can stretch. Let me end this by saying, no, this is not worth the spotlight.

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